Its here

Finally, the day I've been waiting for since September 7 of 2011 is finally here!
I am done high school forever
Its bitter sweet actually because theres some people I know I will never see again
But I guess thats life right
A big thank you to all the wonderful teachers to put up with my socializing and chatting all day long
I hope all my fellow grads follow their passion and interests!
A cheers to us! woop woop!

Lovelier than you

Maybe one day we can go hand in hand down the golden road, and if I get there before you go, I'll be waiting at the door.

Hike OOO

Ocean waves crash on the shore,
A world of ecosystems,
Lays just below the surface.

Mes Amigos

Beauty is all that consumes my eyes,
I am so blessed to have such wonderful people in my life,
Trusting and trusted, makes one feel so comforted,
Its crazy to think that in a few short weeks we will all be seperated,
At this point, I honestly feel lost about how I'm going to manage without any of you here,
I want to cherish all the time we have left,
But even though we are all seperated by distance,
We will always be together at heart,
This isn't good bye, it's see you later.

Springsteen

Bottled up with mixed emotions,
Unsure how to convy,
Even myself I am uncertain,
All I know is I am hurt.

I am hurt, just to be brought back,
To a place of love,
Then it happens again.

Naive and embarrassed I retreat,
How would one act when their emotions are being tossed,
All I know is one thing is for sure,
Surronded by everyone,
I have never felt more alone.

Dear Nicole

Dear Nicole of the Past,

  As I look back, I can see everything and rememeber it as though it is all happening again. I think you've had to experience to many strong emotions in a small span of time at too young and vanerable of an age. I wish I could come back to that time and forget it all, take away all that heartache and confusion. I wish I could show you there were other ways of going about things, ways in which you didn't have to hurt the people you did. I wish you acted in a way with less emotion, and more with your head. I hope you know now that all pain is temporary, and with time it all fades. I'm glad your maturing, keep your wits about you. Because if I rememeber correctly you usually act on impulse, don't do that. Keep your chin up, and shake it off.

The future

You headed off to college at the end of that summer
And we lost touch
I guess I didn't realize even at the moment we lost so much
I haven't seen you in ages
Sometimes I find myself wondering where you are
For me you'll always be eighteen and beautiful
And dancing away with my heart

Psychic

I had a good talk with a wise women the other day,
She had many words of advice that I had never thought of,
Alice was her name.

She could read cards,
The cards she read held my most inner emotions, things I didn't even realize until they were pointed out,
Alice spoke to my heart,
She brought me to tears with her acuracy and revelations about myself,
Guidence and clearity was what I gained from it,
When I walked away from her quaint little store I felt revitilzed,
I have not felt that free in a long time,
Like she helped absorb some of the pain,
Like she took some of the stress,
All I know is that since then,
I have a new outlook on my life.

blurb

now that my future has been decided for the far,
i am no longer sure it is what i want.

how am i supposed to know what i want in 30 years from now,
people say high school isn't stressful, that is not true.

who knows what i am supposed to do with my life or who i am supposed to be.

Sick

I am Sick, ick
This is no fun, my body aches in places I didn't even know could hurt. Nose so red and raw from the course tissues scraping along the Alecia, this is not a enjoyable way to spend a weekend. When I am forced out of bed, its an odd sensation, I feel that I am still semi asleep, am I? There is no drugs to cure the common cold, so forging into battle with my Cold FX and Tylenol Cold&Flu is all I am left with. Hot bathes and sauna's are my only friend this weekend. Soon to be better, but I am still Sick, ick.

Haze

1. The vast circles spin in spiraling octagons through a haze of nights past. The night is long; so long I can't feel my feet hitting the floor anymore. Are those clouds? I can’t tell what's here anymore. Where does the line between reality and fantasy start? The twinkling lights are a sea of stars above my head; I found my favorite; blink once and its gone. A record is being spun, so loud my body is pulsing with every beat. Never wake me; this is a never-ending boisterous night. Spinning, spinning, but never falling.

Past Memory

    Standing in the middle of Dogwood Park my nose grabs hold of a waft, a waft of cotton candy, vanilla like smelling breeze that entangles my head. I am instantly transported 10 years back to being 8 years old standing at the Princess restaurant in Disneyland. My eyes are bulging at the marvelous sights,  I am standing in the middle of this castle decorated restaurant surrounded by sugary, mouth watering foods. A Cinderella cake grabs my attention, I know in that instant I cannot leave without it. The open doors let in a breeze; it’s a nice contrast to the florescent rays beating down on my back. I saunter out to the terrace with my cake, beaming ear to ear. Cotton candy air is being piped in and defused through multiple mini fans engulfing the premises. In this moment I remember pure, uninterrupted happiness; a moment of sheer innocence.

     I am soon brought back, standing with my dog on a walk through the clouds and mist. Its funny how a single scent can take you back to a seemingly insignificant moment in time with such a vivid memory.

HEY

Hey I'm Nicole,
This is awesome!
xoxo Nickypee